What Your Child's Teacher Wants You to Know About the First Few Weeks of School

Here’s something parents might not expect to hear from a teacher: I’m nervous on the first day of school too.

Even after more than 20 years of teaching, there are still butterflies.

I’m wondering what this group of kids will be like. I’m hoping they’ll feel comfortable with me. Most of all, I want them to walk into the classroom and feel welcome, safe and happy to come back the next day.

And I’m very aware that when you send your child through my classroom door, you’re trusting me with someone pretty important.

Yes, you’re trusting me to teach them. But you’re also trusting me to know them, care about them, notice when something isn’t right, celebrate the things that make them special and create a place where they feel like they belong.

That’s why the first couple of weeks of school aren’t really about academics.

They’re about relationships.

We’re learning names and personalities, establishing routines and figuring out how to share a space together. We’re building trust and beginning to create a class community, a group where students feel known, comfortable and like they belong.

There will probably be games. Lots of them.

Your child may come home and tell you they played a game, listened to a story, decorated something or did an activity with a partner.

And you might wonder: When are they going to start learning?

Here’s the secret.

They already are. And so am I.

Those games give students opportunities to reconnect, form new friendships and find their place in a new group. They also show me who jumps right in, who hangs back, who naturally takes the lead and who might need a little help finding their place.

A shared read-aloud tells me who is engaged with a story, who can make connections and predictions, and who is comfortable contributing to a discussion. A simple journal entry can tell me an incredible amount about a child’s writing.

All the while, I’m watching, listening and learning.

Because before I can really teach your child, I need to know who I’m teaching.

And they need to feel comfortable with me, with their classmates and in the classroom before I can expect them to do their best learning.

While all of that relationship-building is happening, there is also a lot of quiet assessing going on.

Teachers are also beginning to figure out where each child is academically. Some of that happens naturally through classroom activities, and we may also begin more formal assessments so that, once routines are established, we can start instruction from a place that actually makes sense for the children in front of us.

But that takes time. A child can look very different on Day 3 than they do once they feel comfortable a few weeks later, which is one reason teachers are careful about drawing conclusions too quickly.

Which brings me to something teachers might not actually say out loud:

Unless it’s important, give us a little time before you start sending lots of emails and special requests.

If there is something we need to know right away, especially something involving your child’s safety, health, dismissal routine or ability to manage the school day, please tell us.

But if you’re wondering how your child is doing academically on Day 3?

We probably don’t know yet.

Give us a little time to get to know the child in front of us, not just the name on the class list.

The good news is that helping your child have a successful start to the school year doesn’t require colour-coded homework stations, elaborate lunchbox notes or a last-minute review of the entire math curriculum.

The things that help most are actually pretty simple.

As much as you can, send your child to school well fed, well rested and on time. School days require a lot of attention, self-control and social energy, especially at the beginning of the year. A good night’s sleep can make a noticeable difference in a child’s ability to cope with frustration, follow routines and be ready to learn. And walking in late when everyone else is already settled can make an already-big transition feel even bigger.

And please send the indoor shoes right away. This may sound ridiculously specific, but teachers everywhere are nodding as they read this.

By the junior and intermediate grades, being “ready for school” looks a little different. Your child may not need you to label their sweater or remind them where to stand at dismissal, but they still need support getting back into school routines.

Help them reset their sleep schedule, make sure they know how they’re getting to and from school, and encourage them to start taking responsibility for things like checking classroom updates, bringing home forms and keeping track of what they need each day.

And don’t be surprised if your usually talkative Grade 6, 7 or 8 student suddenly gives you very little information about school. As kids get older, “How was your day?” often gets you “Fine.” That doesn’t mean they don’t want you involved. It may just mean we need to ask better questions.

Especially if you have a child in Kindergarten or Grade 1.

Sweaters, lunch bags, water bottles, hats, shoes. If it can leave your house, assume at some point it will be lying anonymously on a classroom floor or out in the schoolyard. 

A teacher can reunite a labelled hoodie with its owner. An unlabelled navy blue hoodie that looks exactly like six other navy blue hoodies may be headed for the lost and found.

Bus? Daycare? Walking? Picked up by Grandma on Tuesdays?

Make sure your child knows the routine too, and let the school know about any changes according to your school’s procedures. Dismissal is one area where teachers really do need clear information.

Those forms that start appearing in backpacks during the first week may not be exciting, but returning them promptly is one of the easiest ways to help. If something comes home that needs a signature, fill it out and send it back while you’re thinking about it. Your child’s teacher will silently thank you.

And while you’re at it, sign up for whatever communication platform your child’s teacher uses, such as Remind, as soon as the information comes home. Teachers often use these tools to send reminders, updates and important information throughout the year. Getting connected right away means you’re much less likely to miss something you actually need to know.

You don’t have to know us yet, and your child doesn’t either. But children pay very close attention to how their parents talk about school and about their teacher.

If they hear you say things like, “Your teacher seems really nice,” or “I think you’re going to have a great year,” you’re helping them walk into that classroom expecting it to be a safe, positive place.

If you have concerns about the teacher, absolutely address them when necessary. Just try not to work through those concerns in front of your child.

When a child senses that the important adults in their life trust one another, it makes it much easier for them to build that relationship too. And that relationship matters.

Because when children feel safe, known and comfortable in their classroom, that’s when the real learning can begin.

Talk soon,

Susie

School, Decoded is an independent publication reflecting my own views and experiences as an educator. It is not affiliated with or endorsed by my employer or any school board.